Its a random Saturday night & Im sitting on a hotel bathroom floor at 12:57am in Clearwater, Florida on my last vacation with my fam before heading off for 9 months. Every once in a while the idea of leaving them for that long is scary, but so far off. As of now, its 48 (now that I’m posting this it’s 44) days away, and that is scary. Tonight in specific the idea has me paralyzed. Ive been trying to go to sleep since 9 oclock and nothing is working, and my mind wont let go of the thought of leaving everything ive ever known so very soon. Something i think every racer tries to tell themselves to comfort themselves in this anxious waiting season is “fear comes from the enemy”. That thought is a fact for sure, but it doesnt really comfort me at the moment. Just because it comes from the enemy doesnt mean its not there. The fear is there. The enemy is real. & he will try and come at you with every reason and excuse imaginable to scare you out of what the Lord has called you to. It’s so easy for the enemy to use the excuse of “your only 18 years old” & “you just graduated high school” & “are you really ready to pack up and leave everything you’ve ever known?”  It’s funny too because when this experience is brought up, everyone discusses how exciting it will be and the amazing things I will learn, but no one talks about the hardships we face to get there. I mean I am 18 years old, and I have no clue what I’m doing, I’m just following the Lord blindly, hoping that everything will work out. The thought that overthrows the fear though is this: my God is on a throne. 

I know that sounds weird, but its true. Our God is higher than the others. Our God is our Father. Abba Father looks down on His children. He is Papa. Constantly loving, able, holy, protector, provider, defender, perfect Lord He is. So as i sit  here tonight on this hotel bathroom floor exhausted from the days adventures and quite literally scared of whats to come, I know my God has me in His hands. He is all mighty. He can get me through anything. & if He has called me to this, there is no reason to fear. Fear is from the enemy. Praise be to Him and Him alone. ALL adoration to Him. He is so good. He is all knowing. He’s got me, no need to worry. 

Whatever you may be facing in this season, fear is gripping on, just know HE is in control. He is looking out for you. God is on a throne, no one can overtake Him. His throne is higher than our own, and higher than the enemies. So keep your eyes on Him & the fear will drift away. Our God is unstoppable.

“Since we are receiving a Kingdom that is unshakable, let us be thankful and please God by worshipping Him with holy fear and awe.” -Hebrews 12:28

“The Lord has established His throne in Heaven, and His kingdom rules over all.” -Psalms 103:19